R.A.Tzzzzz

The Word that can not be spoken out loud!!!! 

My fear of the horrible rodents is so bad that i can not even say the word. So you can imagine the horror when one evening after feeding the dog and the kitty, i heard the dog bowl move i had just settled down to mind blowing tv of the moronic sort no brain needed. Anyway back to the noise in the kitchen i thought i had forgotten to let the cat out so i went to the kitchen, and to my horror i saw the arse end of a RAT!! with that long tail going behind my cooker.

No one will ever know what i instantly felt as there are no words in any language trust me,  i started screaming out of fear running back to the living room no one in the house i phoned my son.And by the time he answered speech was no longer an option as i could barely breath tears of fear running down my face i’m sure my bladder gave way to the intense muscles i was using for screaming but i will deny this to anyone who knows me. It took him a few minutes to understand what was going on, get out the house he says i’m on my way  easier said then done door llocked! keys! in the kitchen dog hiding as she has never seen her mummy like this.

 This is now a desperate moment  so i climbed out of the living room window still not really breathing crying well ok  hysterical my    neighbour could hear me came out to me offering to phone the emergency services me violently shaking my head.  My son and partner arrive to me sitting in the middle of the drive a jibbering  wreck  to get anybody back in the house was another drama as my son is just too tall and big to fit so his heavily pregnant partner was heaved through the window my son sorted it all out.But  since then i am sure i have developed a nervous twitch, and i do visit people more than i ever did anything not to be there moving soon and f**k the  RAT………